Husbands Must Submit
One of the primary indicators that a man is leading his family correctly and biblically as a godly husband is whether or not he himself lives a life of submission. First and foremost, this is a life of submission to the Word and the will of Christ. Additionally, he will submit to his elders and Church leadership, and he will submit to his wife.
It may seem like I have crossed over to the egalitarian side of the aisle, but I assure you I have not. As we continue to look at God’s role for husbands, we will see that the man that leads his family according to the Bible must become proficient at submitting.
Submission to God
It may seem like an obvious thing that believers should submit to Christ, yet, as sinful humans we often live contrary to this charge. James tells us:
Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (James 4.5–7 ESV)
We have a textbook on how to conduct ourselves as husbands, fathers, and leaders. It is the entire Word of God. Perhaps one of the biggest downfalls we see in the Christian home today is a lack of biblical literacy among fathers. Paul writes:
If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. (Colossians 3.1 ESV)
We are commanded to “seek the things above…” yet, many believing men are in the habit of putting other things before their pursuit of God. As a pastor, one question I ask frequently to young men and husbands is how much time they spend in the Scriptures each week. Typically, men say they open their Bibles about once a week. Unfortunately, many say they only read the Word at Church.
More often than not, believers seem to claim the same excuse for neglecting time in the Word: they simply don’t have time. Work, family life, other obligations take precedence, while their spiritual walk takes a backseat. Men, if we are not spending time in the Word every day, we are neglecting our wife and our family. We are failing our responsibility as the leader of our family.
Jesus is the Head
Being a Christian means placing Jesus at the head of our home and being led by Him. Only when we are in submission to His will can we be molded into the leaders of our families that we are called to be. This is impossible to do if we are not spending time in the Word and understanding what He wants of us. Total submission to Christ means our devotional time is non-negotiable.
Why is this so important? Because neglecting the Word will ultimately result in neglecting the responsibility of a man to lead his family spiritually. How can children model a behavior they never see? If you’re never in the Word, how can you expect them to be? How can a wife respect and live in godly spiritual submission to a husband who doesn’t lead her? We must reflect the behavior that we expect from our families.
Submission to God means having Jesus lead us in every aspect of our lives. When we are faithful to our practice of being in the Word then we will live with the Holy Spirit dwelling richly in us. The fruit of this is a heart to lead with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Christian men who humbly and prayerfully accept their roles as leaders under God can then create the disciples they’ve been called to as their wives and children naturally begin to follow their lead.
Photo by Mimi Moromisato
